Literally, what the fuck? Anyways, our performance metrics…
Tag: topical
The Lesser Known Cides
Pinotcide: The act of intentionally killing an entire bottle of Pinot Noir or Pinot Grigio on one’s own. Frequently a crime of passion.
Boo Radley’s Tips On a Fulfilling and Healthy Life in Perpetual Quarantine
My first decade of Long Term Quarantine & Social Distancing (LTQSD) was a mighty struggle, so I thought I’d drop off some helpful tips about what you can do today.
I’m the World’s Most Dangerous Soupeteur
And my minestrone smells like vengeance.
Dear Mrs. Rowling, We Regret to Inform You That You’ve Been Banned from the Wizarding World
Even your main allies, Mr. Harry Potter and Mr. Newt Scamander, disagree with your views. It’s a bad image.
Portland State University is Proud to Offer a New Master of Professional Anarchy Studies Degree
As demand for Professional Anarchists has reached an all-time high in the Pacific Northwest, Portland State University is excited to unveil a new Master’s program to create qualified candidates prepared to enter this dynamic field.
Hi, I’m The COVID-19 Testing Kit, and Celebrities Are Just More Important. There, I Said It.
2020 has been my year so far, and I’m not wasting a moment.
Alternate Uses For The Mountains of Tampons We Binged on Tax-Free Weekend
Sales tax holiday weekend came, and now we’re staring down a God damn Everest of tampons stockpiled in our living rooms.