I can’t believe college is only 72 months away.
Tweet Round-Up: 8/9/19
Our favorite tweets from our followers this week.
We’re Sorry To Hear You’d Like To Cancel Your 30-Day Relationship Trial
We offer a variety of packages that don’t come with “labels,” if that’s what you’re looking for.
Why Is Everyone, Like, So Obsessed With Bees?
Big whoop, you make honey.
I’m A Writer With Great Potential And I Want My Fingers Insured
You and I both understand that it’s just a safety net against the fickle fingers of fate.
All the Things Everyone Is Definitely Doing While You Sit on the Couch and Look at Instagram
Meditating in a gorgeous wheat field at dawn, but it’s not dewy at all and the temperature is perfect
8 Tips For Training Your Senator
Do you feel your friends judging you when your Senator acts out, and you’re tired of having to explain that they were like that before you got them?
I’m Transgender Because I Chose to be, Damnit
I was in the womb for NINE MONTHS with nothing to do. Obviously I’m going to rebel and do something just to get attention and make adults mad.
Help Wanted: Diversity Hire
If hired, you give us permission to use your image to promote our Diverse Corporate Identity. So we’ll expect you to smile all the time at work, in case a photo is taken of you for promotional purposes.
