Has anyone ever told you that you should model? Do your patients sometimes just space out and stare at you while lightly moaning? If so it might be irresponsible for you to continue your chosen profession. Take this quiz to see if you’re too good looking to heal someone!
1. When you ask your patient what they are thinking about, do they:
a) Say they’re lost in thought because life has been so rough lately but they also feel #grateful to be in your office working through it.
b) Throw the framed photo of your wife skiing in the Poconos across the room in agony.
2. When you ask a patient about the recent passing of their cat, do they:
a) Go into detail about how it’s affected every aspect of their lives and they hope they can move forward with the help of a great okay-looking therapist like you.
b) Start discussing how just seeing organic butter makes her want to rip her clothes off and smear it all over a man’s body.
3. When you ask a patient about their regular physical activity, they say:
a) I try to be active by running, going to the gym, yoga etc cause I know it’s good for my mental health.
b) Going to therapy motivates me! I used to not workout but now I try to get in at least 3 hours before our session each week and also you mentioned you once swam in a canoe so I bought one and like to swim around it in my kiddy pool in my backyard.
4. When you ask your patient about what they’re looking for in a mate, do they say:
a) I dunno, I guess the opposite of my father lol! He sucked.
b) Hmmm maybe someone with light brown hair with a fleck of grey in it, who likes taking his wife on Poconos trips out of the blue, who practices psychology cause he wants to help others and also someone who lives at 21 Prairie Road and likes to bathe his dog at 11:21 am every Saturday.
5. You get soaked in the rain coming to work and need to change your shirt mid-session, do your patients:
a) Avert their eyes so you can change quickly.
b) Look the most happy you’ve ever seen since meeting them and put on some music from Magic Mike and light up a cigar and tell you to “take as long as you want.”
If You Scored Mostly A’s: Congrats! You are Not Too Hot to be a Therapist
Yay! Your looks are not standing in the way of your years of training to help people. Keep on with your moderate-looking self and inspire the next generation to look inward and address their issues.
If you Scored mostly B’s: Leave the Therapy Field Immediately
It is not responsible for you to practice psychology anymore. You are too hot to help people and will distract people from learning and growing cause they will be too horny. Instead consider other paths like influencer, model or sexy street vender.