Local Artist Makes A Portrait Out of All The Dick Pics She’s Ever Received

Local artist, Casey Williams, age 25, is taking the art world by storm. Her newest piece, “Ladies Night” depicts Victorian women having a quiet, elegant tea party. The piece is currently being sought after by MOMA, The Whitney Museum of American Art, and The Louvre.  

The composition of the piece has a distinctly impressionistic tone.  The focus of the portrait is three women around an opulently decorated table, indulging in a light-hearted mid-afternoon tea. The tableau is largely in earth tones with deep, high contrast shadows, giving the portrait a dream-like quality. 

However, the picture carries a subtle, unusual secret. If you look closely, you can see that the digitally-created portrait is composed entirely of male genitalia.   

We met with the artist for tea – we thought it was only fitting – to ask about her inspiration behind the masterpiece. 

“The universal question between all women is what to do with all these unwanted dick pics men send us?” Casey explained. “So one day, I looked at this clusterfuck of penises taking up space on my hard drive, and thought, ‘how can I make this into something meaningful?’” 

When asked about her process, Casey said, “Each of the penises featured, all 25,000 of them, are individual. I never repeated any of them, partially because I believe they each deserved their own voice. I mean, would you cast a spotlight on only the BBC’s and not the chodes? That’s not fair.” 

Then, between sips, she added, “And also, it’s not like I was running out of material. I mean, 25,000 dicks? Are you kidding me? Why are men so adamant about sending us pictures of their hairy, veiny appendages?”

We then asked her the question everyone has been dying to know the answer to: Which museum will she choose to feature her masterpiece? 

“Honestly, it’s a tough call,” she said.  “I know the big three are after it, and I’m definitely considering each of them.  However, I recently got an interesting offer from The Children’s Museum of Manhattan, so I’m not ruling anything out yet.” 

So, what’s next for Casey? Is she working on anything new? 

“I want to work on something a little more traditional next time,” she said. “Maybe a portrait of a bowl of fruit, or a water-color painting made entirely from semen. The possibilities are endless.”   

We’re excitedly looking forward to seeing more from Casey in the future.

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